Face It: What Women Really Feel as Their Looks Change and What to Do about It

Intellectually, we understand aging. So why does the first wrinkle or gray hair send us into an emotional tailspin? As smart women who were raised to believe that success and happiness are based on intelligence and accomplishments, many of us never expected to feel this deeply about a seemingly superficial issue. But let’s face it, we do! While individually we were taught that beauty is only skin deep, our youth-obsessed culture reinforces the notion that beauty is our currency, our power, and what makes us female. These conflicting messages leave many women feeling trapped in a web of confusion. Do we grow old naturally, since our looks don’t define us, or do we fight the signs of aging, since beauty and youth are prized so dearly? As models turned psychotherapists, Vivian Diller, Ph.D., and Jill Muir-Sukenick, Ph.D., have had the opportunity to examine the world of beauty from two very different vantage points—one where looks are all-important, and the other where they are often viewed as irrelevant. This unique perspective helped them develop a six-step program that starts with recognizing “uh-oh” moments, examines the emotional impact of aging on self-image, and ends by suggesting innovative ways to approach beauty throughout life, so you can enjoy your appearance—at any age!